View From The Front Seat of The Corkscrew Rollercoaster

Right, time for some heavy shit. Let’s get into it shall we…

I’m writing every day now, lots. Not just the daily article but also for college. I find I’m spending more time thinking, contemplating things that concern me, just like the old days.

After all if I’m going to write it better mean something, right? It’s useless to write about things for the sake of a click. So in writing these articles and sharing with you I’m meeting my commitment to myself and showing everyone what goes on inside my head.

The stuff I’m sharing here I publish on my own site a couple of days earlier although I always find that I spend at least 30 to 60 min editing before publishing on Medium so it’s never a true copy and paste - for what it’s worth anyway :-)

In this article I wrote on Saturday night I’m contemplating some the more intense life questions.

I like to go there often. Come along, offer your ideas…

Here we are spinning silently through space on a corkscrew rollercoaster.

On the grander scheme of the Universe, what goes on here is meaningless, at least that’s what some would have us believe.

I prefer to take the polar opposite view that it is in fact the most spectacular and important show in all the Universe.

For the wonder of it all is that we can sit on a wall on a night like tonight, look up at the stars and contemplate the entire thing.

The sheer fact that we can perceive all of this is the most remarkable thing ever.

It’s especially prevalent to me when I’m on my own. That’s maybe why I love my own company so much, nobody else to disturb my peace.

I’ve spent my entire adulthood looking in those calmer moments. I’m not looking anymore.

It appears that fear doesn’t follow me there. No dread, no anxiety, no stress, no pressure. I could leave tomorrow and that would be fine.

I’m ready to go baby, now’s as good a time as any!

That’s the truth.

I promised you the truth in these articles and that what I’m giving you.

Concerns? Yes I have concerns.

Worries? I’ve none.

I can bring bad scenarios to mind no bother, just like you can. They would really upset me if they transpired. But what would be the point of spending my time considering that?

Fucking pointless.

What About God, How Does He Fit In?

It’s late saturday night, tunes are on in the background — God In The Numbers, Richard Ashcroft.

Music is a huge inspiration for me.

Stories rise up like people out of thin air when I hear music. It’s like my mind offers me a movie of the entire thing.

Human Conditions — An album that is very special to me. All the while I was looking for whatever this music was playing.

It was the lyrics that I connected with in these songs. And now that I consider it, are these not like the gospel? They are no different except they come from a true place.

In my baby’s arms I need no faith, I need no words to define myself. — Richard Ashcroft

People who write these songs have lived it. Priests and preachers who live institutionalised lives can’t connect with our hearts the way song writers and poets do.

Very few of them anyway…

Consider the number of festivals that will take place all over the world this summer. Music is religion, music is where God lives for so many people.

In the absence of everything good music is there. Even if we have no music we can remember a song and sing it, reproduce it note for note.

Music puts a smile on your face or a tear in your eye, or both at the same time. I’m smiling right now 🙂

As my mate Richard just sang in my ear “Could there be life without the melody?”

#Synchronicity

Losing The Rage

I used to be very animated about my beliefs around God and religion. I had a lot of disdain and contempt for the Catholic church.

Now it’s all a bit flat.

Religion doesn’t frustrate me anymore, something has put my fire out there and I’m not sure what it was or when it happened.

On reflection, it appears that it was the story I was sold that I had a problem with.

All those damn idiots with collars running the schools driving the thought patterns of children, growing them into good God fearing toothless civilians.

The Church had a free had to direct the sleepy people in the direction it chose, while the state had the perfect moral policing system they could have asked for.

Sure it was a perfect union.

Finding A New Way To Tell The Story

Now, I’m not about to go into a whole piece about spirituality and religion. God knows there’s enough people out there doing that.

All I will say is that my concept of my Self has changed from what I was taught.

Religion gave me and countless others a misunderstanding through a mixed up story. And that’s a real shame because there is truth in the story.

Now my story is different, but it’s one that can’t be explained no matter how well I script it.

My two boys entertain my ramblings even though they might not catch all I say completely.

I’m talking through the filter of my understanding you see, and I mess up the story just like the Catholic church did. Besides they don’t need to hear it from me.

They already know the truth of things and don’t need us to tell them or guide them. They are already connected so better we give them the space to be there.

We Are On A Rock Spinning Silently

Here we are spinning silently through space on our rock ball corkscrew rollercoaster with nowhere to go, and nothing to do.

We’re stuck here. This is the only show in town yet we insist on conflict.

We drop bombs on people, leave people to sleep in the street, tolerate abuse of others, scream at lines of traffic, mistreat our children and rationalise abuse.

There’s a distinct lack of compassion and a very real disconnect between our behaviour and what we know to be good for both ourselves and others.

Why is that?

I don’t know, but sometimes it feels like I’ve been here before. How about you?

So now I play a game with myself where I am the entire Universe, and on that scale what happens here is ok.

I close my eyes and I take a trip across time and space to a place where everything is good. And you see I realise that without these other things I couldn’t do that.

After a long time questioning it seems to me that the world doesn’t need to be fixed.

It’s gonna be alright.

I’m writing and publishing every day for 365 days. If you are an artist or writer or even just a regular pissed off with your job member of the human race, then maybe I’ll have something reasonable to offer you beyond the regular noise. If you’d like to get these articles to your inbox just sign up below and I’ll shoot you a summary every sunday morning.

Originally published at larrygmaguire.com on April 23, 2017.

Howdy, I’m Larry, Writer & Artist. Thanks for taking the time to read my stuff. I write short stories about the ordinary lives of people and the challenges they face. My stuff can be edgy, hard hitting, and sometimes controversial, but never contrived. If that’s your bag you can Sign-up To Sunday Letters Here.

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