
Trading Images of The Self
In our obsession with self-image and the problems it has created, are we destined to destroy ourselves?
When I begin a new issue of Sunday Letters, I’m usually leaning into a subject that has been on my mind over the past week or longer. Something might capture my attention, say from a youtube video, a tweet I read, or an article I came across in my research or just through curiosity. Over the past few weeks, I’ve been reading a lot on authentic leadership, which is really an examination of human behaviour through a particular lens. It is an analysis of inauthentic and authentic forms of the self. It’s a deeper look into an aspect of our humanity at play.
The Centrality of Images
We are obsessed with our self-image. Even for most of us who play a very minor role in the grand stage show we call life, there is a desire to be seen in a particular light. Depending on the situation, we may be a leader or follower, the boss or the employee, the parent or the child, the inflictor or the afflicted, the sadist or the masochist. My go-to humanist socialist, Erich Fromm, wrote on this phenomenon extensively
. So too did his predecessor, Sigmund Freud. Both acknowledge the thinness and destructiveness of the surface-level self formed through a relationship with its environment.When we stare into the mirror, we see a reflection. It is a representation of us that reinforces the ideas and concepts we hold of ourselves. We dress up to fulfil that image, and when what we see staring back meets the ideal, we are ready to go out into the world. But weaknesses exist–largely unacknowledged–and are concealed by make-up, a nice haircut, skinny jeans, and new shoes. The image we have borrowed from the world of other people holds a central role in all our affairs and exchanges and protects us from those weaknesses.
Who are we really? We don’t know, but the image will do just fine for now. Kicking the true self further into the background, if indeed a “true self” exists, we delay self-realisation and the opportunity to connect with a genuine and authentic version of ourselves. In this sense, the world in all its wonder and depravity is a reflection of all that we perceive ourselves to be. We are a microcosm of the macrocosm.
Consider our western industrialised consumer culture, for example. In almost every walk of life and in every exchange, someone is trying to sell us something. Bright, shiny, sexy advertisements depict the centrality of the ideal self-image vying for our attention and getting it. In doing so, corporations successfully identify and commoditise our deepest fears and desires to detrimental effects. They offer us short-term gratification reinforcing the concept that life will be happier once we get that thing, the wife, the husband, the body, hairstyle, new car or whatever.
Our concept of work and who we should be in the workplace is also heavily influenced by the images they portray. They say if we are to succeed in the dog-eat-dog world where survival is bent on meeting the ideal, then we must be productive contributors to the system. In this, there is no allowance or time to perceive oneself in any other way. Never waste an opportunity to put yourself out there, they say, because the competition will get ahead. Someone else will take your job, your slice of the pie. Therefore, you must be bright, shiny, loud, and above all, noticed. If you want something, you better get out there and get it. So we fill every moment of our day in actively pursuing the ideal self-image with internal conflict never too far away. We self-medicate for that.
The truth of the matter is that these ideals, these images, are liabilities sold as assets. And we spend lifetimes in the mode of accumulation of these fake plastic representations of life and the self. We not only wear a mask, so to speak, but we wear many. We step out into the world and say, “hey, look at me, I exist, I am real, I am valuable, tell me you see me!” We need to be validated, and this need can drive us towards behaviour that doesn’t serve us, the planet, or, indeed, other people. And so, everything the ego-based self does in the world is an effort to reinforce its vitality and value further. But what it really reflects is a fundamental weakness in the self.
Research by William Gardner
and Jim Collins points to a solution. Both researchers suggest that to connect with a deeper authentic sense of self, one that acknowledges the world does not exist for our personal gratification, there must be certain antecedents. That is to say, we must live a certain kind of life that holds to a particular philosophy and even life experience. Both Gardner and Collins point towards the impact of dramatic life events in facilitating personal growth and development. These experiences then serve as catalysts for heightened self-awareness and the ability to self-reflect and question the integrity of the schemes of the world we hold.But we can’t force this. It seems to me that it must come about on its own. Despite the efforts of the do-gooder neoliberal narrative, the authentic self cannot be packaged and sold from a supermarket shelf. It’s not available in a book, a psychological theory, a prescriptive set of instructions, or a seminar on finding oneself. In that, there is merely the exchange of one image for another.
The pursuit of a better self appears to serve as further masking of something which cannot be defined. So I wonder if there is any point in talking about these things. If we cannot solve the problems we have created by the force of effort, if these attempts to fix things only further exacerbate the problems, we may need to let the fire burn itself out. Whatever the answer, there is little doubt that the adherence to ideals and the centrality of the ideal image hasn’t really solved anything.
Fromm, E. (2001). Beyond the chains of illusion: My encounter with Marx and Freud (Vol. 780). A&C Black.
Freud, S. (2015). Civilization and its discontents. Broadview Press.
Gardner, W. L., Avolio, B. J., Luthans, F., May, D. R., & Walumbwa, F. (2005). “Can you see the real me?” A self-based model of authentic leader and follower development. The leadership quarterly, 16(3), 343-372
Collins, J. (2009). Good to Great-(Why some companies make the leap and others don't).
Trading Images of The Self
Hey Larry
Thanks again for another thoughtful listen.
This comment covers The Corporization of the world by the 1% of the money holders of the world, (Amazon for example), and the face and profiles the employee present to its customer.
The corporation's goal is only to make a profit. A Monopoly used to be illegal.
A "bone between my teeth" is the customer or product or service to the customer is now an irritant and drain on the corporation bottom line. A line item for cost reduction to increase profit.
Once upon a time, a business put its profits back into the business to improve its service or product. The profits went back into the business to share with good employees trained to sell or make a good thing with honesty. There was a real personal interaction here and people were proud and happy.
example;
I live in a small building with 20 apartments. When I first moved here it was privately owned and I had personal relationships with the owner and staff. All of us did our jobs in our roles with friendly and polite manners.
The place was sold to a corporate Co. which owns 1000s of apartments all over the country
All staff were replaced with the impersonal shit-assed fake smiley faces that say to themselves,
"Oh, that is 12 E." Hmmm, "Am I getting every dollar for everything at 12 E?"
I introduced myself with my first name to the new manager from Missouri and she continues to refer to me as 12 E.
I need a new window screen and my verbal request was answered with, "12 E, You must E-mail
a work order to corporate headquarters in California for an assessment of need"
I tried to look in the eyes of this corporate-trained person. she will not make eye contact.
She is programmed to have no personal connection with the spaces she is in charge of, (I am space 12 E). 12 E, 750 square ft, is worth 1500$ a month.
She made me very angry by inferring that maybe my screen was OK and that I was possibly hallucinating or exaggerating. I had to leave the office outraged and insulted and before I went into a turret-like frenzy.
She speaks to me with corp profit first in mind as she was trained to do, Just business, all about money and profit, nothing personal.
Suson
P.S. Come and visit Golden, Colorado. High Desert climate is a wonderful place to live. and Golden is on the east slope of the Rockies.
Do you have an e-mail or way for me to send a drawing of "corp-face"? I am redsandsart@gmail.com
I have comments to come on your other audio's. Know that I do listen and enjoy.